"Where ever you are, be there!"

 The title is good advice for living in the moment and experiencing all your life, fully.  It is a great goal for those that worry about the past or the future constantly to the exclusion of current sensory input.  The image of the vacationer sitting on the beach with his or her work computer tapping away with a grimace of concentration while the rest of the family is laughing and running and having a good time is the perfect example.

I do think we might  be at a period of total breakdown as far as "living in the moment" is concerned.  It is becoming a time where parties only need enough space for everyone to sit and talk or text or surf the internet.   Family dinners, funerals, weddings, church---everywhere that we previously considered "being there" to include physical, mental, emotional and spiritual interaction with the others attending are already being disconnected by texts/phone calls, sudden photos, and don't forget those people so self-absorbed that when they aren't talking, they are surfing the web for their next thing to say.

Does it matter if we only interact electronically? Maybe--maybe not.  I don't enjoy a lot of chitchat, find most conversation gossipy and boring, am too opinionated to tolerate a nod-session with someone determined to change my religious, political, or latest news item beliefs.  It ends with me sharing my opinion back.  I figure if you are going to take my time I'm going to get some of yours back.

Some experiences are worthy of total immersion, though.  Texting for other people's feedback on a painting in a museum instead of looking at the painting, searching for birds on the net while out for a nature walk or talking to the bff while  attending a school lecture are all examples of times to be in only ONE place for best enjoyment of the experience.

We have all heard about the multi-tasker, "I can do six things simultaneously without a problem", "one thing at a time bores me"  "I'm just being efficient".

OK, (this is the person that can't just listen and nod, i'm showing up for the dance)
1.  It is not possible to do six things simultaneously.  Our brains will start one thing, then another, then another, but attention is not going to stay on 6 things at once, its serial not parallel.  Those six things are getting 1/6th of your attention each, and if they are simple and you are very familiar with them, you may be able to juggle them successfully.

2. If you are bored with one of the things you are doing, quit pretending.  If you don't want to be there, leave.  Don't volunteer to go with the family to the museum when you want to go to a game or a club or whatever it is you think would be less boring.  Believe it or not, some people like the museum or the zoo or the family dinner and don't need to watch you not being there.  Be honest--"I have other plans" is fine.

3.  Most people doing six things simultaneously are doing a bad job at all of them.  Some people may only be doing a bad job at a couple of them and an average job at the others.  No one is doing a great job at all of them. 

If you are the mother of 4 with a sick parent and a job, I am sorry for your situation.  If you are the mother of one with a job and a tablet and a smart phone,set some priorities.  Who is most important, what is most important and do I need to be on the phone and the web twice at the same time while the 3 year old wanders into the street and the boss calls to see why I'm late and the husband yells for clean socks (you may notice that I hadn't mentioned him before,--men find your own socks, your wife is not your servant)

The point is.  If you are paying half attention to everything, all the people in your life know you aren't there with them.  You become an absent parent, an uninvolved employee and a MIA spouse.  And when you are old, alone, wondering where the years went--are those memories of texting and surfing really going to help you through the years?

We all love the net.  But when it is more important than everything else, when it is consuming, when your hand is constantly reaching, well that sounds a lot like addiction.

Think about it.